Posted in Writing

Chalkboard Imagery

My mistakes glare at me in the red letters on the green chalkboard.  The words I said wrongly and the actions I shouldn’t have done.  They glare and remind me that what I’ve done is unforgettable.  They will forever live on this board in this room and also in the minds of people I’ve wronged.  There’s no way I can remove them.  I tried to cover them up with good words and actions, but those small attempts just can’t cover what I’ve done wrong.  The good only temporarily masks the dripping red.  The glaring red of my mistakes shine through.  I am trapped in this room, forced to look at what I’ve done wrong in this life.  There are smudges where I’ve tried to remove my words and actions but those futile efforts only make the board look worse.  I stand in the empty room forced to stare at the chalkboard, knowing there is nothing I can do to erase it or even cover it all up.  It will always be there.  My mistakes and words will be there to haunt and taunt me with their red Ss and Is and Ns.  I am reminded just how unworthy I am, just how not good I am, just how sinful I am.  I fall to my knees in desperation, in tiredness, and in weakness.  I can’t do it.  I can’t ever measure up because those red letters will always haunt me.  “God I need you.” Those four short words escape my lips.

It was then I heard the liquid flowing.  I felt the warmth and the light began flowing into the dark cold room.  Curious, I lifted my head.  Someone was there.  I hadn’t even known there was a door to this room, but He had gotten in.  My tears dried quickly and I immediately felt lighter.  I lifted my head and stood to my feet.  I didn’t have to exert effort though because He was right beside me, lifting me from my desperation, tiredness, and weakness.  I looked to the chalkboard, which was now covered in red.  Oh no, I thought, my sins have finally completely covered the board.  Before I could sink back down, He touched me and urged me to take a closer look.  He stayed right beside me while I walked closer to the board to discover it was blood- His blood- running over my board.  My sins and my actions were no longer visible.  Then I understood who He was that had come to rescue me.  It was the One who needs no door because He is the door.  Jesus had come to rescue me and cover my sins so that they couldn’t haunt me when I had been at my weakest moment.  He had lifted me up and shown me what He had done for me.  Now when I look at that board I can only see the red blood of Jesus and He stays right beside me to guide and comfort and strengthen me.


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